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Wednesday, November 11, 2026

Brad Hammer and John Duff | Is It a Sin / 2022

sinning till the end

 by Douglas Messerli


John Duff, Anil Sebastian, Max Bergå, and Scott McFarnon (composers), Brad Hammer and John Duff (directors) Is It a Sin / 2022 [3 minutes]

 

John Duff stands in a church, wondering if it’s sin to love. Already, given the Duff has made several clearly gay albums, and despite the fact that in that past he has refused to be called gay or put in any kind sexual category of what he describes as a “box,” that he’s posing the question all religious gay boys inevitably have to.


    The original lyrics of the first three stanzas read:

 

If all’s forgiven

Then why am I imprisoned

Can I get a minute

On my knees

 

Please

If you’re wasting time

Then waste it on me

If it always ends

Then we should be free

To love

Am I free to love

 

Is it a sin

To touch you

Is it a sin

To say there’s no one above you

If it’s a sin to love you

Then I’m sinning till the end

Thank God I’m forgiven

 

      But in producer Eric Kupper’s remix of what YouTube describes as the “Official Music Video,” the last line, repeated several times, which I kept hearing as “God I’m gay then,” which I interpreted to read that if it was a sin, he was something other, a gay man outside the church. Others hear it differently, reporting back what’s written or at least something closer to it. (I took a test, without divulging what I heard or even that I heard something different, with several visitors).

     At the site @IAmJohnDuff, the singer writes the message that follows:

 

“Hi everyone! Thank you for watching my video.

     As a gay man, I have dealt with immense guilt and shame for my whole life—due to indoctrination and moral codes created by the church.

     As a lover of Christ's teachings, I have felt overwhelming forgiveness and acceptance.

     As an adult with reading comprehension skills, I struggle to see where the church picked up its bigoted and judgmental stances on love… and how exactly those views abide by Christ’s teachings.

     As a rebel, I wrote “Is It a Sin”. A song for people like me, who do not want to denounce spirituality—but rather ask why they should be denied a place in it.

     I hope you enjoy the song and video. They mean a lot to me. Much love!”

 

     My hearing or mis-hearing (the only line I hear differently from the published lyrics) is not terribly consequential, however, since this still remains a song about hopefully being forgiven for loving God even if the Church calls his loving other men a sin. Most fundamental believers, however, Might even see Duff singing such a song in a church-like setting might deem Duff’s song and actions as blasphemous.

     And there is a big different from admitting to being gay and being forgiven for it.

    But the truly important thing here is that instead of his early denials of being gay, fearful of being categorized, he seems to now accept it as fact.

 

Los Angeles, July 3, 2025

Reprinted from My Queer Cinema blog (July 2025).

Georges Feydeau | The Farce Awakens Feydeau x 2: Going to Pot and Stark Naked / 2026

farce without curtains

by Douglas Messerli

 

Georges Feydeau The Farce Awakens Feydeau x 2: Going to Pot and Stark Naked / 2026, directed by Daniel Passer at the Odyssey Theatre Ensemble / the performance I attended was a matinee on November 8, 2026

 

The popular French boulevard writer of farces, Georges Feydeau (1862-1921), created plays beloved by the French bourgeoisie, works which featured restrained and unpermitted sex, forcing his characters, often innocent and just as often guilty, to slide under beds, stuff themselves into closets, exit and enter quickly through various doors, or just run for the nearest cover as wives and lovers act out their various roles of shock and dismay.

     A good farce is a messy affair, but enacted with near perfect ensemble timing, each leap to escape, attempt to cover up and hide the fact that the individual is not behaving to the requirements of bourgeoise society must be skillfully carried out if it is to make us laugh.

     Moreover, as these two short works make clearer than ever, there was amazingly a element in the farces by Feydeau of the Belle Époque that previewed what would later become the absurdist values of Ionesco and to a certain degree even Beckett: the twists and turns of language, the misunderstanding of behavior, the incomprehensible actions of a disobedient wife—which occurs in each of these short works—and the true ridiculousness of what is being demanded of them by their societally proper husbands, all echo absurdist works that remain with us even through Joe Orton and Edward Albee. And yes, these works are sexist, but they also make us laugh at those very pretensions.


    In the first work, the husband, Fallovoine (Barry Del Sherman) has little interest in the fact that his son hasn’t been able “to go,” his response, “Go where?” He is most distressed by the fact that his wife, Julie (Julie Mann) dares to bring in a washcan of dirty water into his study and, most importantly, that at late hours in the morning she is still indecently dressed in a house coat, with curlers in her hair, despite the fact that he has an appointment with Choullioux (Justin Blanchard), a wealthy manufacturer who just might order up his unbreakable porcelain chamber pots which he hopes might be sold to the military, making him a fortune.


     Getting his wife dressed or even out of the room with washcan in hand is nearly impossible, and the appearance of the badly-behaved child (wonderfully portrayed by little person Kody Nelson, who takes a moment out to explain to the audience that he is not really an underage child, but a full adult playing a child, ironically commenting on our present overreactions of child representation in plays and movies) makes matters even worse.

    The porcelain pots do indeed easily break, the wife refuses to dress, and the “baby,” reminding us some of the bratty babies portrayed in early filmmaking, in particular, the very clever first talkie by the great French director Jean Renoir, Baby’s Laxative (1931)—which incidentally is based on this Feydeau short work, but presents us a much more elegant rendition—manages to make the men drink his laxative for him, resulting in obviously embarrassing events, including the still-improperly dressed wife’s final revelation that Mr. Chouilloux’s wife is sleeping with his cousin.


     If I have already seemed to tell you too much of the plot here, you are missing the fact that it is not plot that is truly important in farce, it is the way the story occurs, the minutiae of events along the way that truly matter, including how well they are executed

     And this cast is superb in that execution, having timed everything down to the second so much so that at moments their language and behavior is simply dizzying. Particularly, in the far more interesting second short play, “Stark Naked,” Rachel Avery as Clarisse, who in this case is not truly stark naked but wears only a tiny negligée that fully reveals her breasts and body contours (it is a hot day and she is simply not comfortable in full clothing) to every man she meets, including the eager servant Victor (Ryan Nebreja). In this work her politician husband (Blanchard) insists that she dresses properly before the arrival of his arch-enemy merchant who ran against him in the last election, Himmelfaar’s (Del Sherman) arrival, a name Ventroux always ends with a “t.”


    Once more his demands have little effect. as his wife weaves a trail of illogical language and actions that finally ties him up in knots as he realizes, little by little, that his entire hopes to become the prime minister will go down the drain as she, stung by a wasp in the derriere demands to have it “sucked out,” first by her husband, then Himmelfaar, then Victor, and a “doctor” upstairs, who is not a real doctor but works in the Department of Medicine—reminding us, of course, of one of Trump’s nefarious appointments. Finally, when a reporter from Le Figaro arrives (played by Nelson, who again reminds the audience that he is not a real reporter but an actor portraying a reporter), he happily attempts to do what the others have resisted, and succeeds.


     Perceiving that his real arch-enemy has been watching the events from his apartment window across the way, Ventroux abandons all his career ambitions in a truly unexpected manner.

    Once more, the cast is simply excellent, proving laughter and entertainment to the audience with their expert memory and precise movement of the complex machinations of the entire work.

   I too laughed and enjoyed both works immensely, as all audiences who attend this play will. But I still felt something was missing.

    As I expounded to my accompanying friend on our drive home, perhaps Passer, who formerly acted as a clown in the Cirque du Soleil’s Zarkana performance and before that in Franco Dragone’s La Rĕve is just not the right director for farce. His brief introduction relates his understanding of farce to be related to the Marx Brothers, Chaplin, Burns and Allen, and the sketches on Saturday Night Live and Monthy Python, a real misunderstanding, I believe, of works such as Feydeau’s

     Farce is not truly vaudeville, and surely not a comic sketch. In high farce, since it still represents the epitome of middle-class aspirations, the work nearly always performed on a curtained stage with utter seriousness, even with finesse. Despite all the running, chasing, and hiding delusions, farce retains a wall around itself as if it were the most serious theater possible. Decorum is demanded even if unobserved. As Feydeau himself wrote: “You have to place ordinary people in a dramatic situation and then observe them from a comic angle, but they must never be allowed to say or do anything which is not strictly demanded, first by their character and secondly by the plot." One could never stay that of comic figures and TV sketch artists where improv is so rewarded.

     In short, Feydeau using the stage to present us with a form of decorum with which the characters on stage seldom can never bring themselves to fully engage, never asks his actors to speak to their audiences as much as to engage with their audiences. This is bourgeois theater for the common man and woman.

     Passer often does just the opposite, his actors cruising the theater before and even while the plays begin and continue and attempting to engage with nervous audience members. During the time needed between the plays for a new set-up, he forces Nebreja and Nelson to do a virtual sideshow act of climbing up and down ladders. The association of bodily movements each time when the name of a guest in their houses (Chouilloux and Himmelfaar in particular) comes up quickly becomes distracting. These routines are funny only for a few seconds.

      What is worse is that Passer provides no source of the translations of these two short plays, so we have no idea how much was actually added or subtracted to the texts; just how Feydeau-ish are these two short Feydeau plays? If Renoir is to be believed, there are a great many changes.

      These are only personal reflections, however, and I strongly encourage audiences to hurry to these two exuberant farcical works. We do need more of such comedy these days in our lives, and this is where you will certainly find it. How often do we even get a Feydeau work performed these days?

     Moreover, almost everything that the Odyssey Theatre has presented over the last several decades has represented some of the finest in world theater in a city, despite many small innovative companies, that needs more attention and audience participation. I promise you an enjoyable afternoon or evening at The Farce Awakens Feydeau x 2 with a talented cast to be reckoned with.

 

Los Angeles, November 11, 2026

Reprinted from World Theater, Opera, and Performance (November 2026).

Wil Sabin (director), Alfie Arcuri (performer) | If You Only Knew / 2017 [music video]

 rue love

by Douglas Messerli

 

Alfie Arcuri, Toby Lee Cameron (aka Toby Chew Lee), and Cameron Nacson (songwriters), Wil Sabin (director) If You Only Knew / 2017 [4 minutes] [music video]

 

Australian singer/songwriter Alfie Arcuri’s 2017 music video, If You Only Knew, is closer, in its visual images, to a short gay film that a typical musical video extravaganza.



   A young man (Travis Jeffery), openly gay, falls in love with a seemingly straight boy (Bardiya McKinnon), who is in a relationship with a woman (Kirsty Marillier).

     The first verse sings of the undercurrent of their relationship:

 

“If they only knew

How to keep you safe like I kept you

How to speak the words they've never used

I wish they only knew

If they only saw

The way my lips would shake when they met yours

The way your heart was met with open doors

I wish they only saw”

 

     The two young men obviously enjoy one another’s company immensely, but as often occurs in such gay films, the beautiful young girl is there almost always demands kisses. Only when she falls to sleep while the gay boy is driving them home, does the other boy lay his head gently on the gay boy’s shoulder.



    In one of their few moments alone the gay boy finally dares all, the danger point of most buddy relationships, kissing his beloved friend, who after momentarily returning the kiss, quickly pushes him away, the gay boy apologizing and rushing off, completely heartbroken. 


    The Chorus reiterates the sorrow the gay boys feels:

 

“They've never ever had the strength

To feel the weight in what we meant

So leave, go home

Yeah leave, go home”


     Finally, after both suffer in their loneliness, the straight boy not even meeting up with his girlfriend, the two boys again meet up in an arcade, where they play a pin-ball game, the gay boy once again putting his hand gently upon the straight boy’s, who this time accepts it.


     Arcuri, an openly gay man since 2013, has reported in several places, including The Daily Telegraph, speaking with Jonathon Moran, the real source of the song:

 

     “I fell in love with this guy and it was instant love,” he explained.

    “We were together for a couple of years and half way through the relationship he came out. The song is almost like a diary entry for me telling his parents how innocent our love and relationship was because to them I was like the devil who turned their son gay. It wasn’t like that at all though, it was a beautiful love.”

      Three years since the couple split, they are still friends and the track will be used by advocacy group just.equal with a series of personal stories being released to coincide with the release

of the single.

     “I never actually wrote this song to be released because it is so personal,” said Arcuri, who was an architect before winning The Voice.

     “Even talking about it makes me emotional.”

 

Los Angeles, November 10, 2026

Reprinted from My Queer Cinema blog (November 2026).

Brad Hammer and John Duff | Is It a Sin / 2022

sinning till the end   by Douglas Messerli John Duff, Anil Sebastian, Max Bergå, and Scott McFarnon (composers), Brad Hammer and John Du...